Fortune Cookie Wisdom

Happy new year.

In some fundamental ways, 2014 was a year of cleaning out for me literally and figuratively. In doing so, I found a collection of fortunes from fortune cookies I collected while in grad school. Yes, I wonder why I still had these fortunes collected in my state championship trophy from high school cross country.

I must have eaten a lot of Chinese takeout in grad school. Enclosed below is a curated subset of wisdom or insights from fortune cookies…or perhaps reflections from the past and thoughts for the future:

• You will be called upon to help a friend in trouble.
• The world is always ready to receive talent with open arms.
• You are generous to an extreme and always think of the other fellow.
• With integrity and consistency -- your credits are piling up.
• You are one of the people who "goes places in life."
• You have the rare ability to recognize ability in others.
• Great acts of kindness will befall you in the coming months.
• Great thoughts come from the heart.
• You'll accomplish more if you start now.
• You will discover the truth in time.
• You will pass a difficult test that will make you happier.
• You are never selfish with your advice or your help.
• You'll never know what you can do until you try.
• You will advance the careers of your friends in your climb to success.
• There is beauty in simplicity.
• You are capable, competent and creative. Prove it.
• Never find delight in another's misfortune.
• You have an ambitious nature.
• You believe in the goodness of mankind.
• There will be someone sharing your warmth. 
• You are able to analyze objectively and express yourself clearly.
• You will come to realizations in your life that will change you forever.
• You will spend old age in comfort and material wealth.
• Your heart is pure and your mind clear.
• Do not do to others what you do not want done to yourself.
• It is time to help a friend in need.
• You will be rewarded for being a good listener.
• Someone from your past has returned to steal your heart.
• It's time you asked that special someone out on a date.
• Do not use your soul as collateral.
• In silence man can most readily preserve his integrity.
• Your ability to recognize the silly in the serious will take you far!
• Time heals all wounds. Keep your chin up.
• Ignorance never settles a question.
• Your love of music will be an important part of your life.
• You will make a change for the better.
• Be prepared for the truth.
• Your ability to juggle many tasks will take you far.
• Moderation is the key.
• The only way to have a friend is to be one.
• The gift is not as precious as the thought.
• You will be a great philanthropist in your later years.
• Remember to share your good fortune as well as bad with your friends.
• It is during difficult times that true friends become apparent.
• Smile. It'll make the world brighter.
• Goods that are not shared are not goods.
• Stop procrastinating -- starting tomorrow.
• Be cautious while walking the darkness alone.
• You will step on the soil of many countries.
• You will be fortunate in the opportunities presented to you.
• You will travel to many places.
• A good laugh and a good cry both cleanse the mind.
• When you give something away, it makes room for something new.
• Be sensitive.
• You will make changes for the better.
• Reach out your hand to support others who need you.
• Wisdom is knowing what to do next. Virtue is doing it.
• Your virtues are your priceless treasures.
• The pleasure of what we enjoy is lost by wanting more.
• If winter comes, can spring be far behind?
• Your dreams are never silly! Depend on them to guide you.
• The love of your life will appear in front of you unexpectedly!

Stress in the US

I think i know one of the reasons for high stress levels in the US. We are constantly making too many decisions and choices about things that don't really matter and not making decisions and choices about things that do really matter.

It might be

For of all happy words of tongue or pen, The happiest are these "it might be"

It might have been

For of all sad words of tongue or pen, The saddest are these "it might have been"

- John Greenleaf Whittier

What's that song?

A description of how technology, data access and my behavior have changed over time.  How I discover the name of a song when I hear it on the radio:

• Stage 1 (decades ago) - Contact the radio station
• Stage 2 (years ago) - Check the playlist on the station's website
• Stage 3 (months ago) - Google unique lyrics
• Stage 4 (now) - Use Shazam

I wonder what the next stage will be.
 

Merlin

I don't know where you came from.  I don't know why anyone would let you go.  I'm not sure why you chose me.  But what I do know is that you've filled my life in a way only a cat can do so.

Magical and mysterious.  Zen master.  Buddha cat.

Hello world, my name is Merlin.

Father's Life

While many celebrate today with their fathers, like many others I'm left to reflect on my dad's life and my relationship with him.  I can not believe it's been almost 15 years since he died.  Yet I also can believe it.  A couple of years ago, I was once seated on a plane next to a woman whose father had just died.  For reasons that I still don't fully appreciate -- other the desire to ease her pain, make her feel that she wasn't alone and be kind to her -- I wrote her a message about how I felt when my dad died.  Here's an excerpt:

"The day after my dad died, I woke up with this unbelievably heavy feeling of realizing that I had spent my entire life with my dad as a part of it and this was the first day of my life without him.  I couldn't really bear the thought.  But one day became two days which became three days and eventually a week, a month, a year and now it's been over 13 years.  I won't lie.  It wasn't easy.  But it did happen.  Time really does heal all wounds.  Or at least make them more bearable.  I still miss my dad.  But I also realize life goes on as well.

My wife never met my dad but I have a video of an interview with my dad.  She noticed that when both he and I are thinking, we brush back our hair with our hands in exactly the same way.  Others have noticed how I look like him or have his sense of humor.  My dad used to start our phone calls with the exact same line every time.  Sometimes when I answer the phone even today, I half expect to hear that line.  So what I've realized is that my dad does live on, within me, through me, and within my memories and dreams."

What do I remember about my dad?  I remember that he was an incredibly accomplished man in both academics and politics.  That he met US Presidents, European royalty, the Pope and Mao Zedong.  Born in a Bangladeshi village that still requires rickshaws to reach, he would fly on every kind of jet (except the Concorde -- one of his regrets), meet Yuri Gagarin and go on a special tour of the Space Shuttle Enterprise.  He would reminisce about the land given to our family by the Mughal Emperor Jahangir.  He was a controversial man and, perhaps like all controversial men, many people thought they knew him or his motives without ever meeting him or speaking with him. 

Yet during the last conversation that I had with him, he told me he would trade all of his accomplishments for a better relationship with me.  That relationships are the only things that matter in life.  And how he regretted not having more people in his life that understood him and cared for him.  How he regretted treating some people badly.  He struggled to embrace his kindness and compassion -- often viewing them as weakness that others could exploit for their advantage.


Land, titles, accomplishments, awards, books, the internet...all of it disappears.  None of it matters.  What I remember and cherish about my dad are his acts of kindness toward me.  And he doesn't live on through me because of my same tendencies to travel the globe or the way I brush back my hair.  He lives on through me through my kindness and compassion.  And my struggle to embrace them.

Happy Father's Day, Abba.  I miss you.  I hope you are practicing random acts of kindness.